King of Pop

Michael Jackson, King of Pop... finally rests. As said by millions of other fans in the world, I will miss you, Michael Jackson.

I remember when I was still young. I especially loved watching his concerts. I danced and sang along to his music. It was he who brought the love of singing to me. My childhood, then, was always revolving around singing. At that time, I wanted to grow up to become a singer. If Im not wrong, I sang in front of my class when I was Primary 2. It felt great.

When I first heard the news of him passing away, I was so shocked and of course, devastated. The person who I felt was going to be there forever, died. Rumors circle if he did become a Muslim. All I can say is that may Allah the Most Gracious, Most Merciful accept his soul.

Since then, the world seems to be missing something. Even though I never met him, its like part of my childhood went away. Alas, life goes on.

So, my prayers be with this great man who brought music and love to me.

Wassalam...

Carnival Preparations

Today, a starting period of Tilawah gave me a bit of a headache. I continued to read but the headache worsened. I stopped for a while and read the Quran, a few more pages. Had a short recess. Got a short talk about the carnival after recess. Unfortunately, I also have to help out. Not that I dont want to help... just that I wanted to take pictures. Anyway, I had Fiqh classes next and I had a good time listening. English next and also, good lesson. Had Geography afterwards and boy, that seemed a bit quicker than usual. Then lunch. Did nothing. Lughah period half hour after the start of lunch. Just discussed about this week's topic, Singapore and its new generation. After Lughah, I had Tafsir classes. I read out my translated verse which Ustd Ruzi told me to do. Zuhr prayers. Had a bit of a laugh with the Secondary 4 boys. Lastly, we had another talk but this time by Mr Muneer... regarding the carnival. Went upstairs after that, packed my bag and after assembly, went for my ICAS Writing paper. I did ok, I guess. After all that, I did my Asar prayers alone and went to Multi-Purpose Room 1. There, I joined Luqman Nur, Luqman Hakim, Haziq, Shazaa, Hijannah and her friend. I was in the mood to talk with them, you know... after a long while, kinda wanna just have a short chat. These people were the ones helping Mr Ismam cause they had Nintendo Wii which I heard was gonna be used at the carnival. I proceeded to look at the variety of games when Luqman Hakim said, "Oh no no, Dollah". Its like he's treating me like a child. Well, after just going through a test paper, I was a bit crabby and said, "I know when Im not wanted..." and I left. Zulfaqar asked me what I was doing for the carnival. Told him my duty and said that I wanted to help Mr Izzad take pictures. To my dismay, Ruzaini got the role. Not that Im mad at him but I never get that role. When Abdul Aziz was at Irsyad, he was the one. When he left, Ruzaini got the part. How many people must leave before I get to help?
Sigh, Im happy for everyone but at the same time, mad and crabby...
Wassalam..

Free Periods

Started the day with Nahu. Clueless but trying to understand. Sigh... Got a bit of what was taught. Spent my recess in the library reading about Winston Churchill. Ended recess and was supposed to have Malay classes when I was informed that Cikgu Iskandar was absent. So, I just talked with Taufiq, Bukhari and Abdul Rahman Abd Aziz. On came Mathematics were I learned about compound interest. Interesting...
An hour later, I had Physics classes. Again, another teacher was not present. It wasn't because Mdm Surianah was sick or anything, just that she was helping the "award-winners" rehearse for the Haflah, if Im not wrong. So, what was left of the class played word games... you know, guess what the person in front wrote. It was fun. I found out that guys were smarter than girls in general knowledge. I mean, who doesnt know Adolf Hitler??? Ok, fine... maybe they're not as interested as worldly events as guys but who cares. Had lunch but this time, I just sat outside in the corridors. English lesson but yet another teacher was absent. And yes, Ms Amnah was absent. About half an hour into the lesson, Cikgu Zainab entered and wanted to tell us a story. Ended halfway but I already knew the story. Told the others and then did some other meaningless stuff. Zuhr prayers. Did that and went back up to find Ustd Ruzi in class. Quran lesson, that was. Lastly, a serving of Nahu which made me tongue-twisted and mind-boggled as ever. Why didnt I concentrate when I was young?
On my way home from school, I saw that the sky was getting dark so I took Bus No. 13 and stopped at Bishan's Prime. To my delight, I met Abdul Aziz in his school uniform. Talked a bit and bade him goodbye, sending my good wishes to his family.
Today, I helped to stand up for the rights and justice of a fellow Muslim. My classmates will know though anyone not a classmate need not know of the worries of my class. And, I also sulked at the fact that the award winners were the same old faces. Ok, maybe the teachers think it will boost our morale by challenging one another... I dont think so. Its a bit demoralizing that the smarts get all the glory. Why cant we have awards for 'Best Neatly Dressed' or 'Most Punctual' or 'Best Conversatiionist'? These small things could make us lesser people feel like...
"Hey, I did do this. Im so glad that people recognised me" And it is these small things that can mean more. Its not always the smart and brilliant that get all the glory. Its those others behind the spotlight, those people dont look at. What people call... Hidden Talent...
Wassalam...

Action

What can I do?
Everywhere, news of disease, war, disasters.
But in no way can I help. I can only pray. Thats just it, isnt it? I... cant stand to just sit and do nothing. I want to help! I do! But unless there's like a free booth for people who want to help people in need. Here I am in my room with the comforts of everyday life whereas other people have to fight for food or protect their loved ones from whatever rebellion in the world there is. I feel so helpless. I feel so sick to the core... Sigh... What can I do?
Thats the question that needs answered...

Sincerity

I dont like Malaysia. I dont like going there. I dont like a country of Malays. Thats what I thought upon coming to Johor. As usual, went to Woodlands checkpoint, crossed the bridge, then to Malaysia's checkpoint. Got to see the new one. It cheered me up a bit. Took a bus to Larkin (Is that how its spelled?) and then checked out the shops there. My Cousin Ya'kob took us and went to their kampung house. The reason we went there was cause they were moving. The government wanted to us their land and their neighbours' to make a bigger highway and so were given 2 homes in a Malaysian type flat. I did the azan for both the houses. Hehe, felt good. The first day, we just packed everything in the house. We slept there. I had an asthma attack. Luckily, Cousin Ya'kob was also asthmatic and he had one inhaler. I didnt bring mine. I felt bad that I couldnt help much so I just went to bed. The next day, a huge truck parked itself outside. It was gonna bring the furniture to the houses. Well, one of them, that is. Cousin Ya'kob had some of his friends at work to help. Suddenly, the moment came to help. As soon as the will to help came, my breathing cleared and I felt strength surge thoughout my body. I helped carry a lot of things. Ok probably dont seem like much bit its uphill from the house to the truck.
By the end of the day, I was tired but still eager to help. We all had dinner at the kampung house for the last time and then left for the house at Pulai, my Cousin Yanie's house. Its a private bungalow house. It was nice. And soon... zzz
Third and last day. Cousin Yanie, Cousin Ya'kob and I went back to the kampung house to take the huge stuff. The trick came again but this time, the furniture were brought to the house at Pulai. Yesterday, we took the furniture to the flat house. There, I did my last prayers there. My Dhuha prayers. It felt sad parting with the house cause I've been there since I was small. After we arrived at the house at Pulai, the driver asked me to climb up the truck to give the stuff to the people below. I was ecstatic. I got to go on the truck! Hehe... helped and soon, cleaned up. Everyone sat down and Cousin Yanti thanked me for helping... so did the others. It so happens that whenever I helped, I lost me weaknesses. Praise be to Allah. My Mother told me, "A sincere heart is a strong one..." And I left for Singapore liking Malaysia. Haha... what a turn of events!!!

My 15th Gregorian Birthday

Its come then... a 1/4 of my life has passed and what have I to be proud of? Im constantly shadowed by my friends and always left out because... well, people dont like being around. But today, rest assure that I will spend the day with the closest of people... my family.

I asked Mother not to do anything grand for me. Really, it isnt that important. So anyway, it was a Saturday, and my father was working. My two cousins and their two children had gone out and left me at home alone. Mother had gone to the market so she wouldnt be home for a few hours. Sigh... Im all alone, I thought.

Towards the end of the day, my Mother showed me a simple square cake... which she had made herself. Oh, I felt so happy that she cared. But alas, my world is small... and anyway, I had a surprise for the family.

Few hours later...

The clock signalled 8pm. Neither my father nor my cousins were home. I felt as if they didnt want me, I gave a small chuckle to cheer myself up. Suddenly, a calling of 'Assalamualaikum' reverberated throughout the house. Father was home! I hugged him and went back to my original seating place at the sofa. Half an hour passed by and my cousins were still not home. So, my parent decided we just cut the cake and be on with it. My parents sang a malay version of a happy birthday song. You know... "Allah selamatkan kamu"? Yeah, that one. I cut the cake and the three of us ate some pizza. 15 minutes passed before my cousins returned. I was like... great, now you show up. But a smile sufficed which showed my real feelings. We ate together. That night, I slept content.

S3 Mini Bazaar 2009

Sigh...
Sorry for being late and all. I havent been writing because I havent had the opportunity to do so. And so, I will start writing what I should have wrote half a month ago...

I arrived at the school, a bit later than Ziyan. He took the bus today so I guess its fair that he waits for me this time. As we placed our bags at the void deck, along came Luqman Nur. Together, we went to the canteen. There, I brandished my infamous camera and took a few pictures in the morning, just to warm-up. It wasnt until the sun rose until I realized that my 'omph' for taking pictures was gone. Ok... more like, there wasnt the feeling of enthusiasm, the lust for taking pictures. But anyway, I just went on hoping that I'd find that feeling.

So anyway, went downstairs and after the assembly, helped to prepare the booths. I didnt find anything amusing. I didnt know what to do. I wanted to take pictures but I didnt feel like it. I also wanted to take the pictures of other booths but I was a bit shy with all the girls around. Most of the guys were at the X-Box booth, not surprising. So, I simply tried to give a helping hand wherever needed. I helped blow up balloons. Afterwards, Ilyas dragged me upstairs to help decorate Rifqi and Bukhari's face. They were our class mascots. I went up and down, up and down, up and down... It was tiring.

Well after that, Ziyan, Adam, Abdur Rahman Yassin and I walked around the school and checked out the booths. It was ok. I tried my luck on the dart board and scored a bulls-eye! Im serious! It wasnt a fluke... though, only Hanafiah saw me. Bad timing, I guess. We went up and down the school, talked with people, venture around places... fun, it was. So, after hours and hours of fun, along with a few moments of prayer and ibadah, I ended the day with a gratifying smile.

Wassalam...

Oooh... Sorry I only uploaded a photo. Not much, eh?